Saturday, March 2, 2013

Day at the Various Houses of Worship

     Two weeks after visiting the pyramids at Giza, I decided to go visit the various churches located right around the Coptic Museum in Old Cairo. I was under the impression that there was a neighborhood with several Coptic Churches, and there were several, but there was also a Greek Orthodox church and accompanying graveyard, a synagogue, and the oldest mosque in Africa all in close walking distance. I went with a friend of mine who had been before and wanted to go again. We walked over to our closest subway station and rode the quick four stop, five minute ride to the churches. As you walk out of the station, you literally walk out to the old walls of the Babylon Fortress with the entrance to the Hanging Church (El Muallaqa in Arabic) about 50 meters away. The Hanging Church's given name is the Saint Virgin Mary's Coptic Orthodox Church and, having been built in the 3rd century, is one of the oldest churches in Egypt. As you can see (on the right) it has an almost Spanish colonial look. The church is so named because it was constructed over the gatehouse of the Babylon Fortress with the nave suspended over a deep passage. Throughout the church, there are windows cut out of the floor where you can look down into the passageways some 20-30 feet below. The original ground level was nearly 20 feet lower than the present ground level, and therefore the staircase you now see was much longer limiting the proper sense of height the elevated building would have had upon being built. To reach the church, you was through a small gate complex, a nice courtyard lined with tiled frescos, up the stairs into a small room with pictures of past Coptic popes, yet another courtyard, and then the church proper.


   
      The church itself was fairly small, but the main highlights, not necessarily for me personally, but for tourists and religious visitors are the icons throughout the area, the original marble pulpit, and the beautiful ebony and ivory inlaid alter walls. I personally dig anything that is carved whether that be wood or stone, so I am always fascinated and appreciative of the work, effort, time, and craftsmanship it takes to complete such a project. The fact that such things survive for us to see hundreds and even thousands of years later will probably never cease to amaze me. Above, Clockwise from the top left, are what I imagine was a guard at the church gate, the doors to the church proper, and a look up through some awnings in the inner courtyard, the inlaid woodwork at the alter, and an alter lamp. Below is part of the alter taken from the aisle. Some of the big iconography was right above this.


     Back outside we decided to put off the Coptic museum since it seemed that it would essentially be packed with more of the iconography that we had just seen. We looked at the Babylon Fortress and read that Roman emperors had built a canal from the Red Sea to the fortress around 100AD and that there was a port suitable to dock ships which seems like yet another remarkable feat. I certainly would like to go back and see see more of the fortress. The Romans were very active building, expanding, and redirecting canals to the fort making it a very important strategic city for many centuries. Below (left) is the remnants of the fortress and (right) the Coptic museum past the walls of the fortress.




     For the rest of the day, we walked around the site seeing a number of churches. Immediately to the left of the fortress is the Greek Orthodox church of St. George, the dragon slayer. The church is (mostly) closed for structural repairs, but we did get to go in a small part of it. Inside there were a number of little cellar like rooms that contained icons and countless pictures of St. George killing a dragon. Also, and I don't know if this is particular to the Greek Orthodox, but there were a large number of torture devises prominently displayed. I'm not sure why they need all that, but the Copts did not have them, so maybe it's just a fetish thing. From St. George's, we walked through the church's graveyard that was a complete mess. It is currently being used, there were people buried there within the last six months, but overall, it was falling apart. There were family tombs that were open, crumbling, and otherwise open with caskets askew, partially covered with debris and visible and accessible to anyone who cared to look. It was a very bizarre, but strangle fascinating at the same time. I was left wondering if any of the family ever came to see the condition of their families, and if so, why they didn't do anything to improve their conditions. I'm pretty much a cremation guy, but I'm pretty sure if I saw a family member's grave open and casket disheveled, I'd get on the stick.


      From there, we dropped down into a below ground, but open-air alleyway that led to the other churches. I gained admittance to the Convent of St.George's. This is significant because it is supposed to be closed to the public and only open to people invited by someone. Apparently the recognized that I am a man of the cloth and welcomed me in when I knocked and asked if we could go in. So, we got to see the chapel that not many get to see. Bam! I got some holy oil from a nun, but, I can bless my own oil, so whatever. We visited St. Barbara's and then Abu Sarga. Abu Sarga is the church built over the crypt where the Holy Family stated when they fled palestine when King Herod was doing his child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang routine. I like to think of little baby Jesus was wearing a tuxedo t-shirt despite the fact that Herod was on his baby killing spree. I guess I'd just like to think that's how he'd roll. There were no picture's allowed, and I couldn't get down into the crypt (I thought about playing my pastor card, but decided not to pull rank), so I peaked down there as best I could. I think stone cellar about covers it. And finally we made our way the the Synagogue of Ben Ezra. The jews apparently purchased it from the Copts when they needed money, and they didn't do much redecorating. It was essentially a Coptic church minus the iconography and a few other Coptic things. Otherwise, it retained the same artwork, inlaid wood, and symbols. They did add their own Jewish pieces, but it was an odd mix of both religions.


     Lastly, we left the Coptic church section of the neighborhood and decided to try to find the Amr Ibn al-As Mosque (above), the oldest mosque in Cairo as well as the oldest anywhere in Africa. It turned out to be very simple to find and was a straight shot about four blocks down the road from the churches. The mosque was virtually empty when we got there and we were welcomed in to take a look around. It is a massive, yet fairly simple open air structure, that was no less impressive despite it's simplicity. It was quiet and beautiful with a handful of non-muslim visitors walking around. there were a number of small groups reading or studying and a few men stretched out sleeping. We were approached by a very pleasant young man who was eager to find out where we were from and asked if we had any questions he could answer. He spent about five minutes giving us a brief history of the mosque and showed us the ancient well that the mosque was built around that was right by where we were standing as well as a column that had been inscribed when the mosque was built. He then took his leave after explaining that he would be happy to answer any questions that we had if we decided we had any later on.












     Right after he left, we were approached by a slightly younger, but much more eager teen who was apparently on a mission to maybe get a convert. Not as smooth, affable, or as socially aware as his predecessor, he spent  much too long working on getting us to join him to learn about Islam. He tried to get us to the mosque's library and video center where we could take any books we wanted for free and watch videos about Islam. Because I was definitely not his guy for this, I had extricated myself early in this process, but my friend was a little too nice to just make a clean break, so I had to go back and be very frank with him about wanting to see and experience his beautiful mosque alone and in peace. He apparently took this well and left us to do so. Above you can see the mosque and its central court (complete with boy in red sleeping), and below, pictures of the interior. The figures in green, who I took to calling gnomes, were women visitors who were asked to be covered during their visit and giving green hooded robes.



















    Next up: The Saqqara Necropolis.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Giza Pyramids

The pryamids of Khufu(background) and Khafre(foreground).

    I successfully found and moved into my apartment, so I was anxious to get out and about and start seeing the sights. This is big for me because I love history and seeing historical sites. Plus, when I lived in Kuwait, there was virtually nothing to see or do. Certainly nothing on the scale of the things that Egypt has to offer. I have been to the Giza pyramids before, about 32 years ago, and have great memories of them, so I was excited to revisit them again as an adult.

     I decided to go with a three colleagues and we decided to go with local public transportation rather than taxi. It is much cheaper, but takes more time to get to, but we all like to explore the city by using public means and we thought this would add a bit of adventure to the trip as well. We walked to the subway and took the train to the Sadat station - which opens up to Tahrir Sqaure. The subway costs only one Egyptian pound (about 15 cents) and is pretty quick and easy to navigate. The system only has a couple of lines, so in that respect it is unlike London or New York, and so remains simple to use. We changed lines at Tahrir and took another train to a station closest to the pyramids. From there, we decided to try to find the local bus to take us there. We got some help from a local guy (who would of course steer us to some business somewhere at the end of the ride), who was helpful and friendly. Finally we walked the last couple of blocks to the edge of the Giza site. For those of you who don't know, the pyramids sit literally on the edge of the city, so as you drive through the city and get close, you can look up and see them through gaps in the buildings.


     Our man did indeed guide us to a local purveyor of horse and camel tours around and through the pyramids. I would have been happy just to walk around the place, but thought it might be fun to do the ride just once. One woman with us had already done the ride an opted to just walk. The other three of us opted for the camel ride and entrance into only one pyramid - Khafre, the middle of the three and the one with the cap still on top. We got our camels whose names we were told were Moses, Mickey Mouse, and Michael Jackson. I was lucky enough to get MJ, though I was disappointed in him not moon walking.

That's Mike on the left chilling while I was in Khafre, and the two of us right before we went to see the Sphinx.  The ride was ok, but nothing special. I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't opt to do it again, but it kind of seemed like I should do it once. Walking is not a problem since everything is really very central around the whole site. If you were old, had a disability, or it was really hot, you may choose to take another mode of transportation, but otherwise, I'd say just walk it. Unless of course you just have to do the camel thing.

     We came in from the south and stopped first at Menkaure, the smallest of the three. This is the one I climbed with my dad when I was 12. It looks small in comparison to the other two, but when you get up to the peak, it is an incredible experience. It was
smaller than I remembered it, but, then again, I was smaller too. Not very many people were there because they tend to flock to the other two, but here is the entrance to Menkaure and some of the casing stones around the base. It looks like this is a modern reconstruction, but the ground around the pyramid is littered with stones that have fallen off or have been removed. This hopefully gives a little idea to the size of the stones and the way that the pyramid would have looked when it was finished. I do remember having to haul myself up the stone blocks when we climbed it, so it was definitely much more than simply climbing stairs.



     From Menkaure, we rode to Khafre, the second biggest pyramid and the one with the cap still intact. We dismounted there and entered the pyramid. The entrance shaft is long (50m), steep, and small (about 4'x4'). You can see on the right that it is long
since I'm about 10 feet in when I took the picture and you can't see the bottom of the shaft. You have to hunch over and only one at a time fits through so you have to wait for the people coming from the opposite direction to clear through before you can go. The passage way was not as spectacular as the one in Khufu, which opens up into a huge, vaulted chamber, but it was interesting to see. I will definitely go back, and will take the time to go into all the pyramids next time. The burial chamber was large, open, and empty, so there is really not much to see. I added the photo below in hopes that the people standing on and around the pyramid could give you some perspective on the size of the blocks used to build it Khafre, and to it's size in general. The top of the frame ends maybe only 1/3 of the way up. The only bad thing about the experience is the number of trinket peddlers outside that swarm you like locusts.




     Lastly, we cut behind Khufu and went to the Sphinx. From the photo on the right, you can see how close the city is to the whole complex. I think people think that it out in the desert since most photos we see are ones that are taken facing west, into the desert, but the whole site is literally across the street from Cairo itself. This is a real problem in terms of pollution and it's effect on the deterioration of the pyramids. In the picture below, you can see the gaunlet of merchants that are out selling their wears in front of the whole place. This is the normal entrance gate is for tourists (we went in through a back gate to the south). From this view, you can see the Sphinx

with the pyramid of Khafre in the back with people walking on a roadway between the two. Khufu would be on the right, and Menkaure would be off to the left. That's about all for the trip, so if you feel like you want to see or know more, you'll just have to come out to visit.

    Next up: The Coptic churches and the mosque of Amr ibn al-As, the oldest mosque in Cairo and Africa. Until then I'll leave to with me knocking the Sphinx out Ali style.

PS, we went back through Sadat station at Tahrir Square late afternoon on the way home on January 25th - the anniversary of the revolution. It was starting to fill up with protestors celebrating the anniversary. No problems, but I wouldn't have wanted to be there later into the evening. I will go back though because Tahrir is where the Egyptian Museum is, and I have to go back there. 





Friday, February 1, 2013

Back on Track





    So it's been a while since I've posted. Too long to be sure. Much has happened since I last posted from Sophia, Bulgaria. I finished my Christmas trip by skiing in Bansko, and then traveling by bus down through Plovdiv and finally through to Istanbul for about five days before having to go back to Kuwait. My stay in Kuwait took a downward turn, but my travels were highlighted by my Spring Break trip to Amsterdam and Barcelona. I was supposed to be teaching at The KAUST school in Saudi Arabia by November, but that job fell through and left me scrambling for something last minute - which is very tough to do. I had a number of possible positions fall through in South Korea, Turkey, and South Africa, but finally got hired by American International School Egypt (AIS). I was hired for two years starting in the 2013-14 school year, but they were able to bring me in early to sub fro the rest of this school year, so here I am. Living in Cairo.

   I arrived here on short notice and the school set me up in a hotel for four days to get acclimated and find an apartment. The apartment hunting was an experience and I saw a number of places that were subpar to say the least. I was lucky enough to have a number of people at the school - one of whom I knew from working in Kuwait, and the rest just friendly and helpful strangers - who were kind enough to step in and offer a hand. I was fortunate to find a place in the Maadi neighborhood, which, I was told, was one of the nicest neighborhoods in Cairo, and one which also has a large expat community. Maadi is indeed nice. The neighborhood is very green with a lot of trees and plants of all kinds. After living in Kuwait, this is a big plus. Cairo is still dirty, with a lot of trash and waste littered everywhere, but I do love having the greenery around to offset that. Maadi also has a lot of markets, grocery stores, shops, and restaurants within easy walking distance, so getting places and finding things is not a problem.


   There is a lot of greenery everywhere you look here like in the picture above. My neighborhood also has many embassies - so far I've seen the Angolan, Ukrainian, South Korean, Swiss, Mexican, and Venezuelan embassies - and some very nice villas. The trees, grass, and bushes are well kept, and though there is a lot of dirt everywhere, you will see people constantly sweeping up garbage. That being said, you also see many scenes like the one on the left. My apartment is right around the corner to the left of the blue car on the left. As far as I can tell, this is where people drop their garbage for collection because this will grow into a healthy sized mound before it suddenly disappears. There are many stray cats and dogs who subsist on these drop sites as well as just the random garbage you will find strewn about. It's a strange mix of green and garbage, but you quickly learn to not notice the latter and appreciate the former.

   The apartment I found turned out to be great. It is a two bedroom, two bathroom apartment on the second floor. Because it has two bedrooms, I have plenty of space available if anyone comes to visit. It has a great balcony that opens up to trees and overlooks a little lawn in front. It came fully (but not exactly nicely) furnished, but I would say it has nicer furniture than most places I saw. I had to buy a new mattress (for which I will be reimbursed), and I will replace the sheets and pots and pans -which are in really bad shape. Other than that, it came with a tv and satellite hookup which has a decent number of English channels. I have a small washing machine, but no dryer, so I have to dry my clothes old-school style by hanging them on a line off a little mini balcony. There is also a decent sized refrigerator and a small, serviceable gas stove. There is no dishwasher. It's great to have a decent size space to live in, and it's hugh upgrade over my place in Kuwait, which was essentially a dorm room where all the teachers lived together. Here we are all separate, but close, so we get the benefit of seeing people when we want without having to constantly share living space. I need to work on getting an internet connection which seems to be an odd process, but until then, I use my phone as a wifi hotspot. It's far from ideal, but it allows me to do some basic things.



   So there you have it for now. Next up will be my trip to see the Sphinx and the pyramids which I saw last weekend. I'll also be off to see as much as I can throughout the city while I can. Until then, I will leave you with this dog who likes to sleep (yes, he is alive) on the roofs of cars in my neighborhood. I'm not sure why he digs the roof, but he does. The car may change, but the he always sleeps in the same spot, regardless of the car there.






Friday, February 3, 2012

Sophia




Ok, so I know it's way past time that I posted something about my Christmas break trip. Those of you who know me, know that sometimes I can be just a little lazy. However. the time has come, and I have decided to write about each stop separately, so hopefully that will make up for the slowness of it all.

I decided to go to Bulgaria and Turkey over break. I'm not sure exactly why Bulgaria, but I had heard that it was nice, and that it was a hip, cheap place to ski. I had offers to go to places like Thailand, or back home, but I didn't want to go home, and I wanted to go somewhere where it would be cold and that I would see green. I had 2 1/2 weeks, so I decided to fly into Istanbul and take a train or bus up to Sophia. From there I would go to Bansko to ski, down to Plovdiv for a couple of days, and then, finally, back down to Istanbul for another five days or so before flying back home. I flew into Istanbul and started checking the train and bus information. The information they had online was a little thin, so I figured I could take care of it when I got there. Well, long story short, I decided to fly to Sophia instead because it was going to be about a 12 hour wait for either a a bus or a train, and then about a 14-16 hour trip to Sophia. There was no way I was going to be on a bus that long, and the train had a sleeper car, which would have been fine, except that they had no individual cars, only ones for six people, and I wasn't into sharing with five strangers. So plane it was.

I ended up arriving in Sophia a day early, but had no trouble checking into my hotel early. The hotel was nice, but they do this weird thing there, well actually two. The first is that all hotels rooms have the heat cranked up to 80 or so. It was incredibly hot, and I had to turn off the heat and open the windows. The second is that they have double beds (and larger), but the comforter is only a single, which I just don't get. Now, granted, I didn't have a companion to worry about, but it was a pain to have to try to keep yourself covered during the night with some skinny little comforter.

In general, I found Sophia to be nice, if maybe a little bit cold. Not weather wise necessarily, but in terms of openness and friendliness. Sure the weather was on the cooler side - it hovered right around freezing with some snow flurries - but it seemed that it fulfilled the stereotype of what it was like behind the Iron Curtain in the 80's. The people were bundled up as if it were mid winter in Moscow, and nearly everyone wore all black. They just seemed dreary and bleak. The kept their heads down or eyes straight ahead, and talked very little. With the exception of my hotel staff, they seemed particularly unfriendly with few exceptions.





For the most part the weather was great. I got several bright, sunny days to explore. Here is where I found I liked Sophia. The history of the city is amazing and I got to see plenty of museums, churches and mosques. On one day in particular, I visited many of the churches you will see here. I forget all the names of them, but I believe the one above is St. Nikoli. They have the great shiny, Russian orthodox spires. The insides were beautiful, with great woodwork, gilding, and painted frescoes. This one was a big attraction because it has the tomb of some guy inside (a saint? a priest? I'm not sure because we didn't spend much time together). Lore has it that if you write down your wishes and leave it on his tomb, it will be granted. Like I said, popular place.

Another place I found was this huge cathedral. I don't remember it's name either, but I had no idea how huge it was as I approached it. I walked through a park with people selling things and I remember thinking that the statue and domes looked like it'd make a nice picture. The place was massive though. It was built in the late 1800's and had great art. It was truly magnificent. The map I had suggested finding and seeing the catacombs as well. It had church art collected from around Bulgaria from the 2nd century through the mid 1800's. I found it just outside the cathedral, but part of the same building. It was an amazing find. They had rescued and preserved some incredible pieces of art, and I got to walk around all by myself which was great, but always seems like a rarity in a museum.




I was about to walk home when I heard music. I found a park that had a Christmas celebration going on with great music. There were women singing old carols in Bulgarian and German. I discovered the goodness of their hot wine and decided to stay until the singing was done. Let's just say I had a lot of wine.






It turns out Sophia was just ok. I'm glad I went. I saw some great things, but it just wasn't unmissable. On the other hand, maybe if I had gone during another time of year, it would have been better. Maybe that's what I'll do. I'll go back during summer and see if it's better. Maybe. Plus, I was offered hookers multiple times and passed up each opportunity (yes mom, it actually happened). If I go back and get bored, there's always that.


Next up: Bansko.



Thursday, December 8, 2011

Bizzaro World

Do you remember the Seinfeld "Bizzaro" episode? The one where Elaine hangs out with the opposites of Jerry, George, and Kramer. They all look similar, but have opposite personalities.

Well, I think I have entered this world. I have switched one group of 7th graders for another, but in so many ways they are polar opposites. My kids in the States had very rough lives, as some of you may or may not know. They had to deal with things adults shouldn't have to deal with, let alone kids. About 80% lived below the poverty line. There were single parents, parents with multiple jobs, and broken families. Gangs, drugs, alcohol, gangs, crime, abandonment, neglect, and all shades of abuse were (are really - I'm gone, but these things did not leave with me) daily intrusions into many of their lives. I guess I had become very hardened to it after a period of time. I kind of just took it for granted that that is the way kid's lives sometimes are. I really noticed this thought within myself as I was talking with a Kuwaiti colleague of mine. This woman runs our library, is perhaps in her early 50's, was educated in the US - doing both her undergraduate and graduate work there, and we have had a number of great conversations lately. Somehow the topic of my old school came up in relation to differences in culture and students and I told her about my experiences in my old school. Mind you it was only the Reader's Digest version, but I quickly noticed her face freeze and drop and her eyes tear up as I spoke. These are things she never really got to see even though she spent so much time in the US.

My students here are the Bizzaro kids to my students from home in so many ways. Chief among them is that these kids have never had to suffer for want (with few exceptions). They have everything they need, and more that they don't, at their disposal. I am doing a writing project right now and it is utterly fascinating. I having them write an extensive autobiography that will take nearly the first half of the school year to complete, and the side effect for me - besides the improved writing skills - is the amazing insight into their lives that I'm not sure I would have ever have gotten any other way. Here, in no particular order, is some random information about my current students. I'll start slow. Most have maids. Yes, maids, plural, four or maybe five. That does not count having a nanny and driver. They have things like TVs and computers in their rooms, which is not so unusual, until you learn that, in addition to that, they also own a laptop, an ipad, multiple gaming systems, and a couple of phones - you know, an iphone and a blackberry, like we all do. And don't think that having something new is good enough. Not when the latest model of whatever it is is out. I get lectured for having an iphone 4, when the iphone 4S is now out. I have to laugh when an 11 or 12 year old has to tell me about the superiority of said phone and tell me that I just have to get the new one.

We have been in the library typing the first six chapters of their autobiographies, and they are appalled by the outdated computers they have there, and rightly so. Their solution to this outrage? "Sir, can we just bring our laptops?" That's right. I am always referred to as "Sir" by the way. Apparently my school badge just has a picture of me with the name "Sir" on it. They will just all bring their laptops to school (I want my teacher friends at home to pause to catch their breath please. I know I could barely even imagine a world where that might be possible, let alone as easy bringing a pencil). And what else have I found out by reading about them? It's incredible really. I've lost count, but off the top of my head I think I have four or five kids whose dad's are ambassador's to different countries. Cuba, Nigeria, Hungary, Chile, and Kuwait (from Oman). I have a mom who a secretary to the king and a dad who is a high up in customs (his daughter found out I had to leave school for a half a day to go get a package that had been sent from home, she told me she'd give me her dad's number next time and then I guess "someone" would just be nice enough to bring it to me). There are dads that work in all sorts of high up government jobs. I have a dad that is the chairman of Rolex (hoping for a nice Christmas gift), and another that does some sort of work for both Rolex and Omega. The ruling family in Kuwait is named Al Sabah, and we have a number of students with this name at school.

They all travel. When they get to where they are going, they all stay in their house they have there. Whether that is there chalet at the beach, or their house in Paris or London. They have houses in any country you can name in the Middle East, and some have houses in Paris, London, and other places like Spain. I mean, how many people do you know that didn't send their teen aged daughters (you know, like 12, 13, 14 year olds) to Egypt to see Beyonce. It's enough for me to seriously start considering bribes. If you see pictures of me in Chamonix wearing a Burberry scarf, Rolex watch, Spyder

I'll save the topic of absentee parenting for another time though.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Decisions, decisions.

It's been awhile I know, but I'm a little lazy. I've also been a little busy. Busy trying to figure out all my vacations. Last year at this time I really had no idea I would be overseas. I mean, I always knew I wanted to teach overseas, but I hadn't started looking yet, and had no immediate plans too. But, conversations with coworkers who were looking to make the move lit a fire under me, and now here I am.

The great thing about teaching around the world is that affords the opportunity to travel, which I haven't really done since I was a kid growing up moving around the world with my parents. In the past, for vacations, I would always think local. Should I go to the beach, or maybe up to the mountain to go skiing? Usually day trips, nothing special. Now however, it is different. We had a week fall vacation for Eid (a Muslim holiday), and I found out very late in the game that I would be able to travel (long story short, I had visa complications, and I thought I would be Kuwait bound, but that is another blog story). Where would I go? Turkey, Egypt, Cyprus, Italy, and Sri Lanka all crossed my mind. Where to go? And what about Christmas? Spring Break?

Oh, how complicated my life has become. The choices are far too many, and everyone has their favorites. "Where are you going on break?" is the constant conversation starter. Everyone wants to compare and contrast. After much searching and several mind changes, I ended up going to Sri Lanka for Eid. Egypt is a little on the "exciting" side right now, Turkey had an earthquake, and the other places, while attractive, were very expensive at that late date. Let's just say I made a good choice.







Now, my choices are back again. I'm off to Bulgaria to do a little skiing for Christmas. Everyone I know is either heading home or somewhere else warm, but I want cold, snow and greenery (I guess I miss Oregon), so I am off by myself. I decided to land in Istanbul, and take a sleeper train up to Sophia to hang out there for a couple of days. Then down to Bansko for a week or so for Christmas (ever since I spent a Christmas in a ski village in Austria, I've wanted to do something like it again), then back down to Istanbul for New Years. Hopefully I'll get in some skiing, some snowshoeing, some steam rooms and massages, some R&R, with good food and drinks, and top it off with seeing some sights in two beautiful cities.

Now I just need to start planning ahead for Spring Break. I'm thinking either Portugal or Spain, but I'll take suggestions.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Tragedy: German Embassy runs out of beer!

So I get invited to a Canadian Thanksgiving dinner hosted by Canadians In Kuwait, and decide that I should attend. Pretty much every western person I've met here is from my school, and I feel like it is a good thing to branch out and meet some new people. Plus, I'm a sucker for turkey, gravy, and mashed potatoes, so I figured if all else goes south, I've got a little bit in my belly. I'm not really sure what I expected, but it was an interesting event. They locale was very plush. The event was held on a giant, dry docked ship. It was truly impressive in terms of both scale and craftsmanship (see picture below). The crowd was a bit odd though. It felt a bit like I was on a movie set where people were just extras pretending to be party goers. They were nice, as Canadians tend to be I suppose, if just a little bit stoic. We drank apple and guava juice out of champagne glasses like we were kids playing grownup. Yippee!

Into the hull of the ship we went, and grab a table at random where we knew nobody. We introduce ourselves, order more apple juice, listen to a speech from some attache from the Canadian embassy, and duly stand for a rather poor rendition of the Canadian national anthem, which sounded like it was being played by a group of drunk middle schoolers. We quickly struck up a conversation with the couple sitting next to us. He was German, and she was Canadian. They admitted that they were unhappy with the lack of alcohol at the function (much as we all were), and launched into a story about their previous night. They had been at some function at the German embassy and had had the great fortune of drinking heavily. The night turned into something out of college where they got hammered, drove home drunk (not remembering the drive), but stopping first to get Dominos pizza on the way home. She was on her way to being drunk again having smuggled in some hooch in her purse and pouring some into both her juice and her Coke (I liked this woman), while he launched into a story about his embassy.




He was particularly unhappy that he was told, when he went to get another beer, that the embassy had run out of beer. "Can you BELIEVE zat? Zay told me zat  zay had no more beerah! Since when do Germans ever run out of BEERAH?!?" At this point I have to nod and concede the point. To my knowledge, outside of the siege at Stalingrad, the Germans have never been without ze beerah. And now he is really worked up and enjoying his outrage from the previous night. He talked about how he threw a little bit of a fit and was confronted by the German Ambassador himself, who basically told him, again that they were out of beer. "What an azzhole!" he kept saying. "and he couldn't even speak English well. I agreed again saying that two things I hated were being cut off by those with poor English skills, particularly German azzholes. He got a big kick out of this and grinned broadly, buoyed by my support. Then he turns to his girlfriend and says, incredulously, "Zhen, she goes up to him, with ze BIG BOOBS and ze BLONDE HAIR, and he gives her a BIG hug and (that's right, you guessed it) MORE BEERAH!" I look again at her and indeed, she is an attractive woman who is clearly proud of her boobs, and I can see how she would garner a hug and more drinks. "Zey had more beerah for her, but not for me. Not for ze German. Zat guy iz an azzhole!!"

I need to hang out with this guy more often, and I need to get myself invited to some embassy parties. I need to go to a tailor and get a suit made so I have something to wear. I need ze BEERAH!